Okay, Monica, just sit down and write your goodbye column.

But I can’t.

You can.

But I don’t want to.

Yes you do.

But if I write this column, it’ll mean that it’s really over. It’ll be the end of something that I’ve loved, something that I’ve worked so hard at. Once I let go, it’ll never be mine again.

It’s never been yours to begin with, remember? That’s what you’re always telling yourself.

I know, you’re right. Things will never be the same, though.

Yes they will. You’re only letting go of the physical aspects of being Editor-in-Chief: your office, your chair, a computer to stare at. But the memories will always be yours to share with those you worked so closely with. We’ve done so much this quarter, haven’t we? The section editors really cleaned up their pages and were really responsible journalists. Thank God for them, right?

Yeah, thank God.

But Monica, you’re always up in the library or Campus Center working on something. You never have time to just sit around. How could you ever miss this place? It was such hard work.

No, it wasn’t really.

How so?

Well, the people made it worth the effort. The editors, the staff, the readers-they made this experience well worth it.

But they’re people-and with people, there are memories, and memories never fade-not when they were built as solid as these.

True.

Here’s what you need to do: get up out of your chair, look around your office. Study the plaques, remember the history. Know that you are a part of that. Turn around, approach the door. Take one last glance around and turn off the lights. Shut the door and walk away.

I can’t do that – not that simply. I’ve never been able to do that.

But you’re a different person now -you’ve grown so much these past two quarters. You developed and honed skills you never knew you had.

Yeah, and I want to continue doing so.

Just remember the good times – the nights when editors didn’t need prodding, when writers looked to you for coaching. Remember the compliments you received, how people said this year’s paper was the best it’s been in years. Remember that.

How could I not?

Remember the bad times, as well, for they were truly learning experiences for you. But don’t internalize them like you always do. Take them, hear them, and cast them aside.

That’s all too possible.

Remember that this was your life, your love. These were your friends and your best memories. Let’s not forget the stress, the anger, the enemies and nightmares. Okay, but compare the two-which do you have more of?

The former. You’re right.

So do it, Monica. Leave. Turn it over. Give it to Butch (real name: Robert Haugh) – he’ll run it more swiftly than you ever could.

True. Leap of faith, and here I go.

A large cluttered desk sits against a plaque-adorned wall. The answering machine beeps a small red light as I approach the door to make my final exit. I run my hand across my computer one last time. One last glance. One last breath. A sigh of relief, of sorrow. With a proud smile, I reach for the light switch. The room is dark and empty as I reluctantly pull the door behind me. From outside, I twist the doorknob to make sure it’s locked.

It’s over.

Thank you. I’ll miss you all.

***

Special thanks to my editorial board, without whom none of this would’ve been possible: Robert Haugh, Jasmin Bodmer, Caroline Perez, and Jon Paul Hoornstra. To former Editor-in-Chief Christopher Pommier who provided me with a solid base with which to build upon. To the staff writers and former staff writers: Tammy Roseberry, Sara Spivey, Catherine Kung, Lakeshia Hardy, Daniel Mart, Melinda Latham, Art Martinez, Edgar Pimentel, Mariah Waite and England Wei. To photographers Brian Cua and Eriko Watanabe, and photo guru Nelson Ching.

Also, to my adviser Beth Grobman Burruss, who listened to my worries, guided me through the trouble spots and really understood where I was coming from.

Joe Bruna for keeping the computers running and keeping the lab occupied when the pages were running late. And of course for “Joe’s Jives.”

To the cartoonists: Karl Yu, Eric Lerner and Dave Codeglia and to graphics artist Karl Dotter- you folks crack me up.

And without Debbie Perez, our ad manager, our words would never go to print.

Thanks to the 1999-2000 DASB for providing adequate funding for printing.

Thanks to all the readers who spent time with La Voz. Without you, there would be no forum for expression, no breeding ground for debate, no student workshop for us.

I wish both incoming Editor-in-Chief Haugh and the rest of La Voz continued success and the best of luck. I’m pushing for you all the way.

Thanks again. I’ll miss this place.

Monica Krauth will transfer to

UC Berkeley next January

within the English Department.

She is fervently seeking employment.